i told everyone that i was over you. i deleted your number from my phone and your face from my camera. i think they even started believing me…i think i even started believing me. but ive got everyone fooled you see, even myself, and i know that because i went out to lunch today. its one of the first times ive left my flat since the night you slammed the door and promised never to open it again. i went out to lunch, and when the lady asked me i almost said table for two instead of one. when she sat me down she took the extra plate setting, and i had to bite my tongue before anything came out. i was reading the menu, quietly telling myself that people werent staring, and i took a breath and shook myself out, and looked up with the words ‘what are you thinking’ dying on my lips. i was looking at an empty chair, but all i saw was your face. the blurriness of my tears only making my hallucination clearer, and i gasped as you looked up and me and laughed. ‘you think youre ready for this?’ you shook your head at me sadly, and i wiped at my eyes to make you disappear, but found myself missing you as soon as you were gone.
(k.g) i paid the bill without eating that day, and walked home trying not to look in windows, in case i saw you there walking next to me (via lesmotsfleuris)
You will be stupid. You will worry your parents. You will question your own choices, your relationships, your jobs, your friends, where you live, what you studied in college, that you went to college at all… If that happens, you’re doing it right.
Ira Glass (via wordsthat-speak)